I am sure that this will pass, but I resent it in the same way I resent sleep when it catches me… I am tired. I occasionally remember that I have to bother people about finishing my incomplete course from last semester, that I have to pay for school if I am going back, that work has more hurdles lined up for me on top of the ones I tripped over last week, and the knowledge of it all ties me in a bigger bundle of the same knots I end up in when, having finally sat down at the end of my day, I find that I still have things that need doing. “Can’t leave things unfinished!” the voices say, and I believe them, and I get up again to do it all before I sleep. I always do. Damn sleep. And so I know I will get up again and keep running, but to what end? Is it only so I can get it all done before I sleep? Or is a constant, frantic doing a way to somehow stave off sleep?
Just Kristin
… a gentil harlot and a kynde.
My solution to this kind of thinking was to start thinking of only what absolutely had to be done within that day. If the world won’t end if you don’t do it today, it’s just not that critical, really.
Take time to rest and catch your breath, do something fun or go take a walk and find something beautiful and restoring. Then you have the energy again to deal with the rest of it. There’s a postcard you may have seen next to my computer: “I have so much to do that I am going back to bed.” Sleep is a restorative, not a curse. ;^)
Or grab some good B vitamins and some L-Tyrosine. That usually gives me enough energy to handle just about anything. ;^)