Just Kristin

I just watched my grey­hound, Sache, chew at her itchy spots so vig­or­ously that, once sat­is­fied, her head was low­ered to the sofa with a “thud”: She had worn her­self out scratch­ing at what itched her. After an after­noon of hunt­ing for answers, I get the feel­ing that I have done the same.

Up until a few min­utes ago, this post had con­tained a sec­ond rant against the Wash­ing­ton DC Catholic Arch­dio­cese and their deci­sion to strike out against the help­less in order to make heard their tantrum against those pesky, evil homo­sex­u­als. It was accom­pa­nied by a graphic show­ing my con­ver­sa­tion with a Tweet­ing nun who is vocal in her sup­port of their big­otry. While I am leav­ing a link to that image, I am replac­ing the rant. I do so not because I think any dif­fer­ently, nor because I am any less desirous of a real answer to my ques­tions, but because there was, in the first iter­a­tion of this post, far too much essence of the lit­tle girl who was ever frus­trated to the point of seething over the priests’, nuns’ and CCD teach­ers’ inabil­ity to answer any of her more dif­fi­cult — but infi­nitely and impor­tantly mean­ing­ful — ques­tions about the faith they wanted her to adopt. Her frus­tra­tion had been born in large part out of fear that not believ­ing all things Catholic would dis­ap­point the adults who so wished her to be a good and pious girl.

I do not need that lit­tle girl to speak for me any more. I no longer look for answers to the ques­tions she asked, as I am cer­tain that no one has them. No priest or nun can con­vince me that their insti­tu­tion­al­ized big­otry and sex­ism can bring me to a bet­ter rela­tion­ship with god. Reli­gion, I have come to under­stand, is - at best - a tool used to mea­sure, and to bet­ter, one­self. Wash­ing­ton DC’s Arch­dio­cese lead­ers, and thru her endorse­ment of their actions, Sis­ter Anne, all serve as a per­fect exam­ple of how reli­gion ought not be — but too often is — used: as a thick, barbed yard­stick used first to mea­sure and then to inflict pun­ish­ment upon oth­ers. If the Catholic Arch­dio­cese of Wash­ing­ton DC wants to penal­ize the needy in their com­mu­nity, as well as their own parish mem­bers, over a law made out­side of their orga­ni­za­tion, then let them have their tantrum. In the end, this whole thing will empty their pews and fur­ther define their hypocrisy in the eyes of those who had per­haps wavered in their opin­ions. Sis­ter Anne’s and the Archdiocese’s pathetic attempts to cite legal (read: state-granted) “reli­gious free­dom” as a rea­son or an excuse for their actions sim­ply skirts the real issue here: They are beat­ing their own fam­ily for the sins of the neigh­bor. Inexcusable.

Sis­ter Anne, you are no more equipped to give me a straight answer regard­ing the non-legal, the ethical/moral aspect of the Archdiocese’s actions than were the nuns of my child­hood. Faith is not enough. A call­ing and its implied spe­cial unity with the god­head is not enough. A sim­ple, hon­est answer would be enough, but none of you are capa­ble. Since I no longer desire the run-around, the excuses and vague plat­i­tudes, I beg you: don’t even try. You might strain something.